When They Will Not Come” (WTWNC) names the social dilemma of the church in post Christendom when we can no longer assume non-Christians will come to church even when they are seeking God. This new cultural condition forces us to change the way we think about every aspect of the church. WTWNC is a series of posts that reflect on the ways the practice of being Christ’s church/church planting must change because of this new cultural dilemma.
Illustration by Ben Sternke of http://benjaminsternke.typepad.com.
I never wanted to live in the suburbs never mind buy a house here. But God led us here. It’s a story I’ve told elsewhere and so I won’t repeat it here. My wife and I are now buying a house for the first time in six years. We’re doing it for 2 reasons. ONE, for the first time in 6 years, the combination of the down payment we had leftover after we sold out last house (what was left after giving) and mortgage + expenses, now is about the same as if we rented the same house (prices have come down that far). So it makes financial sense. Having said this however, I urge all missional pastor/leaders to be real careful in buying a house or any real estate. I think I’ll go into this in a latter post. TWO, and more importantly, our church is under housed, and we need gathering places in the neighborhood locales if we wish to get going on our vision for missional orders in the burbs. The place we rented wasn’t big enough for this.
As we have been looking at houses, praying over the neighborhoods, seeking where we might buy a house, I have walked the neighborhoods trying to open my eyes to where mission could be engaged. I find the suburbs difficult for mission. The poor are so hard to find. Yet as I walked and prayed, I found my imagination stoked by the Spirit. Mission was all around the rhythms of this place. The poor (of all kinds – see Jonathon Brink’s post on this over at Allelon here) could be found. Here are ten missional places I noticed.
1.) The Hospital: (we’ll be two blocks from a hospital). There are few places where people are this poor (in spirit if not other ways), broken and seeking God than in the hospital. Practicing the presence of Christ in the hospitals is a spiritual discipline. It changes me, it ministers Christ. I could develop a regular weekly rhythm where I could spend a few hours a week assisting the chaplain there at the hospital.
2.) Foreclosures: Foreclosures are popping up (there’s a few in the neighborhood). (Neil Cole gave me this one) These are opportunities for Christians to minister to hurting people, bringing peace, helping them readjust and think differently about life.
3.) A Ride with the Police: (there’s police available in every neighborhood) This is a Tony Jones move (read his account of riding with the local police here). I think it’s a great one. Neil Cole once said that the police know where the trouble spots are in the burbs. They know where the hurting people are, the drug addicted domestic abuse is. He suggested to Christians in the burbs to go on a regular ride with the police, find these places, and find ways to hang out and minister.
4.) The Local Bar: The bars are where people go when they are lonely, searching. (there’s one eight blocks from the house). I envision a regular visit the same time every week. Alan and Deb Hirsch say that for the first year of going to the local bar in a regular rhythm, you are getting to know the locals. By the second year you are the locals, and you have earned the right to be heard.
5.) Mom’s Play Groups: (I noticed young children in this neighborhood). All over the suburbs, through the internet, lonely moms get together under the excuse that their kids need to play together (It’s not an excuse). These moms have some of the greatest community. I’ve witnessed this first hand with our young son. When you get there, look for the hurting left out mom, the single mom, maybe the mom with a troubled child, spend time there caring and supporting. Practice the generous serving spirit of Christ. You will be changed, and others will be too through your ministry.
6.) McDonald’s: (there’s a great McDonald’s in this hood). I don’t care where you go, every McDonald’s has a local breakfast club: usually a group of men who sit around, talk sports and joke around before they go to work. If you go the same time everyday, they’ll soon get to know you and you’re life will become an open book to strangers who become friends. Trust me on this; you don’t even have to try on this one.
7.) The Hockey Rink: (there’s an ice rink about two miles away) Ok my son is only three, but I’m thinking hockey (my first love) already. The only way I could afford it is if I coach. This is in my plans in the next few years. Having hung out with hockey kids, their behavior is rude and their dads are even worse (forgive me if this is an over generalization). Being missional might be as simple as not swearing every 5th word, berating someone publicly and treating every one like cr__p. It might be as powerful as setting the direction for a young kid’s life.
8.) The Elderly Center: (A care center for elderly is next to hospital). The most neglected of our society. There are so many elderly who live in retirement homes who need to talk to someone and understand their lives with someone. Find an elderly care facility and visit someone on a regular basis.
9.) The P.A.D.S. Center: PADS stands for Public Access to Deliver Shelter. (I notice a PADS center two blocks from our house!). It is an excellent organization serving the homeless in the suburbs. One of the things they do is train mentors and put them together with homeless. The missional opportunities here are obvious.
10.) Hospitality with your Next door Neighbors: It is so hard to get to know your neighbor in the burbs. They often don’t want to talk. And if you’re a pastor, you’re rarely home. I must make time to be in neighborhood. But then to overcome the distance, some subversive tactics might be in order. Like sell your lawnmower and ask to borrow your neighbors, ask someone to baby-sit your dog. As time goes on, the barriers come down, and you can share some barbeque in the back yard.
All of these places are within 2 miles of my house, almost all of them within 8 blocks of my house. I am encouraged that this house can be a place for mission.
ONE LAST THING – ONE PERSON CANNOT DO ALL OF THESE! I recommend doing what is already part of your daily life. Then add one and make it part of your weekly rhythm. I aim to add one of these to the ones I already do. Once you’re in a rhythm, aim to simply be Christ to the people you are among. God will use you, opportunities for 1 Pet 3.15-16 will occur regularly. Mission will change you and your life will be take on a new level … of living the Mission.
Where are some of the other opportunities to engage “the poor,” the ones most ready to receive the gospel?
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David,
Thank you for this Post. Our church is in Hoffman Estates and we have been talking as a church about ways that we can be more missional in our community and this was very helpful. It is good to see people thinking outwardly in suburbia. I forwarded this post to our church because I believe that it may inspire some.
Cheers,
Matt
David, I am intrigued by your early comment about the danger of purchasing a house v renting.
I have always thought that purchase says ‘permanent’, or ‘here to stay’ whereas rent says ‘just looking’.
We notice that renters do not seem to engage nearly as well as buyers because they are seen as transient.
We bought our house partly for economic reasons (cheaper than rent) but also for the message it sends about commitment to the area.
I know in WA country towns this is especially the case. If you go there as a missionary and don’t buy it will take you at least 10 years to convince them you’re not a fly by nighter!
This is great Dave – wonderful that you point out the validity of being missional in the ordinariness of our own surroundings. Three comments:
1. In ‘God in the Alley’, a very good read on missional life, Greg Paul alternates his chapters between stories of being Jesus to others, and seeing Jesus in others. His point is wonderfully made, and even though his setting was inner-city, is none the less applicable to suburban. And I think we really need to see Jesus in the other to be Jesus to the other – a variant on Bonhoeffer’s comment that true fellowship can only exist through the Jesus in me fellowshipping with the Jesus in you (Life Together).
2. A testimony – it involves being missional to my mother-in-law – but heck – Jesus loves her too. Dorothy and I had sufficiently contrary values that we had substantial periods (measured in years) of not enjoying each other’s company. Total warfare was not a risk due to our natures, but a fight to the finish by a pair of passive aggressive is still deadly in its effect, and is the most languishing of deaths for both ‘combatants’. At 84, Dorothy became wheelchair bound, was placed in a nursing home, and was largely isolated from her family. I duked it out with God for about 3 weeks, and then embarked on a program to visit her 2-3-4 times a week. We lived within the same suburb, and so I would walk over and read to her. Within 2 or so months, God had so changed my heart that I was running down the street to see her like I was a teenager going to his girlfriend’s. The visits became an incredible blend of community (her roommate usually joined us), a significant ministry to Dorothy, a formational spiritual discipline for me, and a chance to witness to staff and patients. This lasted for 2.5 years, and since her passing in January I have frequently marveled at the miracle God worked in my heart.
3. Kingdom Hockey? And Jesus said ‘Unless you play the game by my rules, and no longer slew foot your opponents, you cannot be on my team.’ And because of what Jesus said, many of his Canadian disciples said ‘This teaching is too hard for us.’ and so they withdrew, and no longer went about with him.
matthew .. hope to meet some day ..eh?
upstream … yeah, I’ll address this in a later post. Suffice to say here, than in some wealthier sectors, home ownership became an idol, a source of security, from which when people bought a house, all their time, energy and adoration became focused inward. In a perverse way, I have not always seen these forces resisted in even missioanl church contexts. The result has been that houses suck from mission. A house must be bought in affordable circumstances, never reaching beyond what can be well afforded (else it take more time away to pay for it), it must be low maintenance, it must be strategically bought for its inherent characteristics as a place of hospitality and mission.
Jim .. as always …enjoy your thoughts … at Wheaton … we always wondered after some heated fights whether we could be “Christian-hockey players”
Thanks .. DF
Hmmm…the Wheaton Philistines… that’s what I would have called the team. With pride. Important for a Christian school. A name like that would avoid any risk of the D becoming subverted by sanctimonimity, ’cause they would know they are flesh and would revel in it. Tough D is important.
Delights me that one of the Hauerwasian Mafia is a player – kinda (but not really) like being ‘righteous and sinful simultaneously’. I didn’t lace up as a kid – one of my 2 big regrets. Curious though … if Mark Driscoll were coaching, do you think he would have let you play? Or if Doug Pagett had wheels, would he have benched him anyway? Bill McKinnon – if you are tracking this one, I am curious to hear your thoughts.
Hockey as mission – in my town (Edmonton, Alberta), a local missional organization, Fusion Canada, coordinated various individuals, community groups, stores, police and city rec. dept. to restore an abandoned outdoor rink, and then made a point of being on the ice connecting with kids. Plus had a grand opening Christmas banquet (120 people) for free for the community. Blessed the community, huge networks and connections created, as well as massive credibility, as they were more concerned for the community than in building their own Christian edifice. And now that they are working on other missional projects that seek to expose people to the Kingdom and its power to transform communities, the non-church and non-Christians within the network are willing participants. Kinda like them Celts.
Is anyone else noticing the suburbanization of poverty? Check out a thoughtful post on this by Bob Lupton, author of Theirs Is The Kingdom (Harper and Row, 1989). He talks about about how the poor are migrating to the suburbs. Here is an excerpt:
“It was the first meeting of this kind I have had – four pastors, a county commissioner, three community leaders, all suburbanites. They had invited me to breakfast at their favorite local watering hole, for me a full hour drive north from the city during morning commuter time. Their issue, the one they felt I might assist them with, was the appearance of “my people” in their suburban community. In the past, suburban church folk – those with a social conscience – have commuted into the city to serve the poor. They have partnered with our urban ministry to build houses, tutor kids, donate used clothes. They journeyed into the city because that’s where the poor were concentrated. All that is now changing. There are still plenty of needy neighborhoods in the city, to be sure. But poverty is gradually, relentlessly suburbanizing. The poor are gravitating to the periphery of the city where more affordable housing can be found – like 40-year-old rental complexes, yesterday’s class “A” apartments that now show signs of aging. The “disadvantaged,” once confined to urban ghettos created by the out-migrating affluent, are now “out-migrating” themselves. And suburban pastors along with their parishioners are not quite sure what to do with their new neighbors.”
To read more of Lupton’s post, go to http://www.fcsministries.org/up/ and click on his March 2008 archive of “Urban Perspectives.” The archive is entitled Suburbanization of Poverty.
David,
Thanks for your thoughts on this. In the Minneapolis suburbs (Chaska, to be specific) we have definitely seen a tremendous rise in poverty, often hidden away in pockets that can easily be avoided.
In our community, the churches recently joined together under the banner of an organization called Love INC (in the name of Christ) where we coordinate our efforts to meet the needs of the poor and seek to see them plugged into the life of a local church community. It has been a fantastic effort that is continuing to get better and better as the churches work together.
Thanks for this article David. It was excellent.
I find the poor/homeless always congregate in the parks in Lombard and Wheaton.
Each of these ideas are great. You might add getting involved in the local school. They are often quite happy to have churches send volunteers to simply do the dirty work or help with reading groups. And it doesn’t have to be a big program, just one or two people making connections in a school can touch the whole community. I even got to develop a relationship with two principals who both became believers. I even did the funeral for the second one’s husband and got to preach the Gospel and talk about eternal relationships to the extended community of the school district and friends.
And if you are recognized by a child as someone who cares and they see you in the community, they will talk with you, and you can bet that their parents will want to know who the heck you are… and you can tell them.
As far as home ownership goes I find it funny that you have baggage concerning it. Do what makes sense to your community and who you are trying to reach out to. You can be just as prideful as a renter as a homeowner. I’ve even run into some people who worship living on the street.
Good stuff-
Since I moved to Rockford 9 months ago, one of the best decisions I made was to coach wrestling at a public high school. In the matter of a few months, I have started some great relationships with students, my fellow coach, and families in the city. In my particular context, these relationships have led me to parts of the city a lot of my friends in church have never been to in the years they have lived here.
Continuing these relationships in the “offseason” has proven difficult. Mostly due to the fact that my wrestling social network does not easily mix with my church’s social network. I guess some of this is my fault too for not being more available relationally.
Still, I have found that coaching is a great way to engage missionally.
This is a great post, I wonder, however, if some of it reads similar to a previous post here, which portrays people as projects.
For example, my daily/weekly rhythm at a local coffee shop has inadvertently begun to foster some great, authentic relationships. But i feel that if i had begun to hit up this place with the intention of ‘witnessing’ to the morning crowd before i stepped foot into the cafe, these individuals would, in all honesty, be projects to me. I’m not looking for opportunities to be missional, i’m looking for opportunities to be authentic; for a chance to live with others and if conversation happens, so be it. The notion that i stake out a group of individuals and create a rhythm to theirs, again, strikes me as a people as projects metaphor.
For the record, my response here is meant display what i wrestle with as much as it is meant to critique.
joel … I get your angst there.Thanks for expressing it. Where I think that comes from is a place that assumes that I, the “subject” am in control of said “object,” the person who “needs Christ.” Instead, we ARE (part of)God’s Mission int he world which assumes He is sovereign. When He is sovereign, we are His ministers always ready to respond to what he is doing … this for me takes that kind of “modern” control angst out of the picture. We still must be intentional in our obedience … but can avoid ever seeing another person within the purview of our control…
Blessings and thanks for the comment ..
David,
I love this post. I just sent it to all my leaders and staff. Thank you for your thoughtfulness!
Without wax,
Will
I hear you about not having a house that needs too much work. However, God has used the experience I have acquired fixing my house to minister to others. Poor people often have house projects and no money to hire the work done. My experience allows me to spend time with them helping them improve their living conditions. I don’t need to join Habitat for Humanity, I just need to be available to help my neighbor.
Good post David – I too live in the suburbs, on purpose. So much to do here, so very much. Thanks for your ideas and your heart – Blessings, Jim
David,
Thank you for this. I hope you don’t mind, but I’ve cited you, paraphrasing for a UK audience and linking to this post, in my sermon for tomorrow. Your ten action suggestions seemed to be so consistent with what I imagine the Jesus of the Gospels doing today.
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